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Previously: Ana goes to Georgia to get some an are from Christian, so normally he adheres to her there. Since that’s the sort of guy he is.—

Lorraine: Guys. Ns beg you. If friend have any kind of friends who like this book, send lock the link to this recap and also ask them to account because that themselves IMMEDIATELY. Then, take into consideration getting brand-new friends.

You are watching: 50 shades of grey chapter 23

Sweeney: I’d more than likely move directly to getting brand-new friends and skip action one. You’re a better person than I am.

Lor: Yeah, I just want civilization to read this recap… Here’s why:

Ana is looking about the bar to check out if she can spot Grey. Her mommy is all, “you look prefer you’ve checked out a ghost,” and Ana describes that Christian is there. A real mom would’ve been all, “WHAT IN THE really HECK,” but Ana’s mommy is all, “really?”

Sweeney: Negligent parental of the book is type of a need here.


I have neglected to cite Christian’s stalker tendencies to mine mom.”

Oh, go you? Did you forget to point out that? Silly.

Ana clues Grey coming towards them and her inner Goddess “leaps up cheering from she chaise lounge.” She keeps she chaise lounge situated in the west wing, close to the parapet of she mind. I’m certain she’s neglected to tell her mother about the human being living in she head too. (S: For mine own personal amusement, I’ve made decision to snapshot all the this together being made the end of legos. Plus, it makes the random new additions much easier to explain.) Ana notes that Grey look at mad. She gets scared because that a 2nd before she reminds herself that wait! She’s the one who’s mad here, see as how he’s confirmed up on her “I need space from you” vacation.

Sweeney: I hate as soon as I forget that i am the one who is mad.

Lor: When he reaches your table, Ana squeaks the end a hello and also he kisses her on the cheek. Ana introduce him to she mother, and he greets Momma by her name- also though Ana never ever told him what the was. Aw, stalker boyfriend is so thoughtful. I feel like this need to be a meme. “Stalker Boyfriend constantly knows the names of friends and also family.”



I’d fairly not talk about the quantity of time I spent Googling “creepy mustaches,” or the fact that I decided I simply felt also sad for most of these people.

Lor: This is for sure perfect. Ns wished because that a meme and it came true!

Grey smiles at Momma.

“My mother’s reduced jaw almost hits the table. Jeez, gain a grip Mom. She takes his proffered hand and also they shake. My mommy hasn’t replied. Oh, complete dumbfounded speechlessness is genetic – I had no idea.”

I love as soon as EL makes the jokes because that me. It’s in ~ this suggest I’m happy these space fictional characters, due to the fact that that method one less threat come our gene pool.

Sweeney: ns disagree. The variety of people who not just find every one of this appealing, however revel in it sufficient to encourage your friends under this rabbit hole of mind-numbing whatisthisfuckery? That makes me fear for our gene pool far much more than Ana and her mother.

Lor: I concede your suggest and weep because that humanity.

Things acquire creepy once Grey “smiles knowingly” in ~ Momma and also she’s every “breathless” and his eyes room twinkling. Y’all want to it is in alone or something?

Ana interrupts the minute by asking what he’s act there. He’s all, “duh. I’m right here to check out you.” Ana repeats his words earlier to him, other than she sounds like “a sophomore ~ above amphetamines.”

Well then.

Grey’s all, “you stated yesterday the you wished i was below so I totally tracked down your whereabouts and made your deep desire a reality, girl.” Stalker boyfriend is the best.



Lor: Momma invites Grey to sign up with them for a drink. The orders:

“I’ll have actually a gin and tonic,” Christian says. “Hendricks if you have it or Bombay Sapphire. Cucumber through the Hendricks, lime v the Bombay.”

Holy hell… only Christian can make a meal out of notified a drink.”

It have to be great to it is in Ana Steele and also be great by every one of life’s tiny wonders, favor “ordering things” and also “knowing what friend like.”

Christian states that he just happened come be eating dinner at the ar where they to be drinking, totally coincidental like. Before we dwell on how huge a simultaneously this in reality is, Grey compliments Ana’s tan and new shirt. Stalker Boyfriend always notices what you’re wearing.



Lor: Grey claims that he was going to watch her the following day, but that, right here she is. He holds she hand and it provides Ana horny. Seriously, she feels his hand hold “in her bloodstream.” her breath hitches and everything.

Momma and Grey little talk a tiny about what wonderful points Ana has actually said around Grey. She invites him to dinner the next night and also then excuses herself to the toilet again to give the two alone time.

Grey pounces: he wants to know if Ana’s mad in ~ him for having dinner v an old friend and also she murmurs yes. Grey whispers that his sexual relationship with MRS. RAPE was over a long time ago, choose that makes anything about that entire instance better. Ana says that she think of her as a child molester, probably since that’s what she is. Christian doesn’t think so, though. The whispers the Ana is gift judgmental.

Sweeney: Clearly. It’s an extremely judgmental of her to contact someone a criminal once all they have done is be a criminal.

Lor: Ana, bolstered by alcoholic bravery, explains that MRS. RAPE took advantage of a 15-year-old boy. Then she transforms the tables: what if it had been a 15-year-old girl with a MR. RAPE. What if it had actually been his sister Mia? It states a lot around this publication that this is hands down my favourite Ana moment so far. You know, the component where she phone call rape rape. Don’t issue though, I’ll be ago to hating the entire civilization in just a moment.

Sweeney: ns was a little dumbstruck by it. It’s kind of like as soon as someone that is usually not every there mentally has a rarely lucid moment. It was shining and wonderful and also obviously around to finish really soon.

Lor: Grey just repeats the it wasn’t choose that and also that MRS. RAPE was a force for great in his life. Anyways, the doesn’t desire to talk about it now. And if she doesn’t desire him around, he has a aircraft on stand-by. However of food she wants him around. She asks him come stay.

Sweeney: Begs. Ana obviously has lower levels of “beg” than this, however for a common person, she NOPLEASESTAY eagerness would certainly qualify as begging.

Lor: When she tries come further describe why his dinner through MRS. RAPE bothers her, Grey reveals the they are company partners and also that their partnership ended since her husband uncovered out about it. Space you falling more in love v Grey yet? space you? room you? are you?

Ana asks if Grey loves MRS. RAPE but Momma walks up at the moment. Grey takes his leave, phone call Ana “Anastasia” i m sorry impresses the Momma. Grey whispers “laters, baby” in Ana’s ear and is gone. Ana’s mother tries to convince her to seek him, due to the fact that after spending roughly 5 minute watching lock murmur and whisper at every other, she to know they are epically in love.

Sweeney: I have hated a most fictional parents because we began this blog, but never have I hated a fictional parent this difficult before.

Lor: I’m pretty sure it’s an extension of Grey-hate. Wait you support Christian Grey? Yep. Hate you too.

Worst Momma ever before uses the truth that that flew thousands of a miles at a moment’s notices to find her as proof that his love. Stalker boyfriend will always find you.

Sweeney: I currently did that one. Lather, rinse, repeat.


Lor: LOL. The fact that the moves provides it creepier. Seriously. Can’t watch it for as well long…

Encouraged by her mother, Ana decides come go up to Grey’s hotel room. That answers the door and also he’s ~ above his cabinet phone, babbling some more Business-y talk for Dummies, which clues at him looking to get some land in Georgia. Certain YOU ARE. Of course the land close to Ana’s family is appealing. When the call is over, Ana murmur-asks him again if he love Mrs. Rape. He claims no, that didn’t.

They flirt a little and Ana’s biting her lip and also Grey’s every “don’t execute that, i flew a long way to watch you,” and I’m not sure what one needs to do v the other. Restless Lip Syndrome never ever takes a break, Christian. Not also on a vacation. Don’t be insensitive. Grey offers Ana his “sexy, predatory” look and her breath hitches again.

Grey accuses Ana of just coming approximately his room because she want sex. Ana whispers that she really did desire to know around MRS. RAPE. Grey’s all, “whatever friend say. Sex or no?” “Yes,” murmurs Ana.

“You to be so mad at me,” he breathes.“Yes.”“I don’t remember anyone however my family ever being mad in ~ me. I choose it.”


1.) Seriously, no one? no even, i don’t know, her pedophillic dom? Or like a teacher? Or a kid on the playground. NO ONE?

Sweeney: possibly he has Ana’s exact same highly-selective-memory condition.

Lor: 2.) Stalker friend likes to make you mad?! ns mean, if that weren’t chapter twenty-freaking-three, and we still cared about things choose “red flags,” I would certainly say that having a boyfriend gain off on making friend mad would be bad. But, i mean. Whatever.

Sweeney: 3) Why room we pointing out your family members as a precursor to sexytimes? It’s choose Item #8644 on the perform of points That Skeeve Me Out around This Situation, but it’s there every the same.

Lor: Valid.

“He operation the advice of fingers under my cheek.”

What an suitable typo! It’s awesomely murder-y. Whose fingers is he running under her cheeks? Oh, girlfriend know. Just some disembodied finger he keeps around.

Sweeney: A+

Lor: Guys, what room you thinking appropriate now? Right, appropriate now? “Well, Lorraine. We, together the collective people of the web were just wonder what Christian smells like.” I’m glad you asked, Internet, for E.L James has actually just informed us that Christian in fact still smells choose Christian.

Ana whispers that they have to talk, yet Grey manipu-kisses her and also is all, “no. Later.” Grey is kissing her almost everywhere when he asks, “are friend bleeding?

LOLOLOL. I’m sorry, what? ns mean, legit inquiry dude, yet doesn’t “are friend bleeding” it seems to be ~ archaic? just me?

Holy Fuck,” thinks Ana (with a funding fuck.) “Does nothing on slide by him?

Stalker Boyfriend constantly knows once you space shedding your uterine lining.




Grey asks if she has cramps and also she states no. He asks if she take it the pill and she states yes. So, off they walk to take it a bath.

He starts come undress Ana and announces, “I’m walk to have actually you in the bathroom, Anastasia.” No shit. You invited her in the bathroom to have actually sex through her in the bathroom?! run back.

He takes off her jeans and also underwear and also then kneels behind her. That bites her ass. (?) climate he murmurs in ~ her that she is so beautiful. So beautiful that he desires her to feeling her. That guides she hands up and down her body, over she breasts, with her pubic hair and also such.

Grey undresses and they begin the heavy petting again. That stops suddenly to ask when Ana began her period. She answer yesterday. He find this agreeable.

Why is that asking? Why does the care? What wake up next? I’ll quote it. Because I’ve seen civilization link earlier to the recaps and also accuse me the exaggerating or reaching. So, no. I’ll just quote it directly from the book and also then an obstacle you all to accuse me of exaggerating this here:

“Hold on to the sink,” that orders and pulls mine hips ago again, prefer he did in the playroom, so I’m bending down.”

He reaches between my legs and also pulls ~ above the blue wire – what?! – and also gently traction my tampon out and also tosses it into the surrounding toilet. Holy fuck. Sweet mommy of all… Jeez. And also then he’s inside me… ah!”


Okay, okay. Let’s back up because I don’t want to be judgey. I recognize that, from a purely logistical standpoint there is nothing not correct with having sex while on your period. I’m not going to market my opinion ~ above the subject issue one means or one more even if this particular step calls to mind unit volume such as “used tampon smell” and also “clogged toilet.” Whatever. You go for it. You period fuck till the cows come home.

My large question, ladies and also gentlemen, is WHY. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING to ME. Why to be this had in this novel?! Why did EL feel the require to include Grey PULLING the end HER TAMPON, oh MY GOD HE simply PULLED the end HER TAMPON. Has actually that do this step in this erotic novel ANY an ext EROTIC because that ANYONE? Is over there anyone plan their following love do session approximately prime tampon pullage time? Did friend not acquire the allude that Grey was regulating of every facet of her life, before he was likewise controlling she female hygiene? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?





Lor: Thank friend for giving my ache a gif-face.

As one aside, i wrote an email to a team of my ideal blogging friend (affectionately recognized as the Nipocalypse to no one yet ourselves) around this details scene in the book because I had to recognize if i was overreacting. Ginny claimed the best thing ever: ns don’t even like taking out my own tampon.

And that around sums that up.

They both come. (GAG.) lock sink down onto the floor and I guess they are spooning however Ana describes it together Grey, “imprisoning” her. Stalker boyfriend holds you hostage v his hugs.



Lor: Ana murmurs the she’s bleeding and also Greys all, “duh.” He says it doesn’t bother him and also Ana’s every “clearly.” Grey asks if it bothers Ana and also she decides no, it doesn’t. Grey decides they should have a bath anyways. Ana notices that the tiny scars top top Grey’s chest space actually burns. She whisper-says the his scars aren’t chicken pox and also this immediately makes Grey go on the defensive. Ana presses though and also whisper-asks if “she” walk this come him. Grey says that of course Mrs. Rape didn’t perform that come him. She’s not a destructive person! Why need to Ana demonize her?

“He’s standing there, naked, gloriously naked, v my blood ~ above him… and also we’re lastly having this conversation.”

OH GOD for REAL? YOU had TO REMIND us THE BLOOD IS top top HIM together THEY just STAND THERE and CHAT? I hate THIS BOOK. I dislike THIS book SO, therefore MUCH.

Sweeney: I likewise appreciate how deep Ana think she’s being through her whole we’re-literally-naked-and-exposed bullshit.

Lor: Ana wonders what Grey would certainly be favor if that hadn’t met MRS. RAPE. I’m gonna guess, “fucked up but not raped.” just off the optimal of my head.

They climb into the bath and also after a little bit of silence,Grey states he would’ve taken ~ his birth mom had it no been because that MRS. RAPE. If you’ll remember: “My mom was a crack whore, Anastasia. Now go to sleep.” So he’s saying he would’ve finished up a crack whore.

Grey says that MRS. RAPE loved him in a way that he discovered acceptable. Ns can’t also wrap my head around that after all that’s taken place in this chapter, too ~ friends. He continues that she “distracted” the from a “destructive path” because growing increase in the rich, perfect Grey household was yes, really hard. (S: #firstworldnotproblems) Grey states he can’t take ago his past, and also anyways, the wouldn’t want to. He also says he’s never told anyone this much except Dr. Flynn and also he’s only telling her due to the fact that he desires her trust.

Ana claims that she does to trust him (LOL.) however that she desires to get to recognize him too. He’s all, “uh, ew, whyyy?!” Ana cuddles up alongside him and whisper-asks him not to it is in mad in ~ her. He isn’t, he simply isn’t used to talking to anyone however Dr. Flynn and… MRS. RAPE.

Now Ana is interested in what he talks to MRS. RAPE about, though she’s mainly wondering if castle talk about her: yes. Ana’s pissed and isn’t satisfied through Grey’s, “we talk about you because you aren’t prefer anyone I ever met before!” Ana snaps, asking Grey is that “take advice from Mrs. Pedo.” It’s MRS. RAPE Ana, however that’s a pretty great one too.

Sweeney: Agreed. The was another one of those rarely fleeting wonder moments.

Lor: Grey snaps ago and says if she keeps phone call rape rape and also saying reasonable things and asking good questions, he’s walking to placed her throughout his knee! Grey summarizes the she’s simply a girlfriend he used to fuck who saved his life and also whose marital relationship he ruined. …okay.

Grey growls in ~ Ana for this reason she knows concern time is over. Well, at least it’s currently time because that him to question her. Twenty three chapter later, what Ana thinks about the Sexy time Contract is still a precious question. Look at the blazing plot advance y’all. It’ll offer you whiplash.

Ana claims that a whole weekend of gift someone she isn’t doesn’t sound appealing. Grey agrees the she’s a destructive submissive. Somehow, us still have a book. And also finally, we can stop pretending that any of this shit is about BDSM. Due to the fact that it isn’t. Due to the fact that Ana doesn’t desire it to be. Since Ana sucks as a submissive. Now, equation:

Fifty Shades the Grey – Fake BDSM = (ABUSE. Domestic ABUSE. THIS IS ABUSIVE.)²

They it s okay to talking around the first time Grey spanked Ana and she admits it to be worse in concept than in practice. The idea the spanking freaks her out worse than the really spankings. Ana asks why he needs to regulate her and he says, “it satisfies a need in me the wasn’t me in my developmental years.” Ana’s all, “oh cool, so controlling me is like therapy,” and also for part reason, thinking that Grey is gaining therapy from beating she helps her.

Sweeney: an ext descriptions seemingly traction from stories of domestic abuse victims. Swoon, ladies!

Lor: Get me the end of this chapter.

Oh, wait no. Not yet, because they room going to have actually sex again, with Grey grabbing Ana’s wrists. She whisper-asks him come let she go, and he go on the condition that she doesn’t touch him. There’s a many sloshing water and mention of moisture and also slipperiness. In situation you wondering. Ana’s reasoning the entirety time just how much she loves she Stalker Boyfriend.

Cut come the two of castle in bed, talking. We find out that Grey’s favorite film is The Piano. We discover that Grey hasn’t retained count that how plenty of women he’s slept with, however he to know it’s in the 10’s. (S: I speak to bullshit. No method you’re certain it’s in the 10’s but haven’t kept count, especially because he does have a counting for who has remained in the playroom.) We also learn that Grey’s paid because that sex, a la BDSM training. Ana’s shocked however she’s likewise sad that she can’t shock Grey. The says, “remember the one time you wore mine underwear LOL!” since he thought that to be super shocking that the Panty Prankster. Ana’s within Goddess is at sight proud the this, and also we know since she “pole-vaults over the fifteen-foot-bar.”

Other shocking things = Ana was a virgin and also Ana phone call Grey through his first name. Whoop-dee-doo.

Grey promises Ana a surprise for the following day and then commands Ana come sleep. Ana has actually never felt happier in she life.

I’m sure if Grey would’ve known that, he would’ve pulled her tampon out weeks ago.

See more: Ebony Teen Home Alone - Black Woman Alone Images

Big ups come Sweeney because that the meme and making this chapter a little less painful.

Murmur counting – 10Whisper count – 16

Chapter 24

Favorite comment critical post:Christian: LOL gonna stalk you ‘n spank friend ‘n ingredient you in a crate :3Ana: o__OChristian: oh crap did i scare you!? Totes didn’t average to!